NGFL

1.13.03 - Ohhhhhwiiiiiiieeeeeeeee......

*As the screen fades in, we see Smo and Gro poised at the oh-so-familiar desk with inches of dust covering everything.

Hubb: *best announcer voice* AND NOW...HERE IT IS FOLKS...THE MOMENT YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR...THE RETURN OF NGFL AND YOUR TWO FAVORITE NICE GUYS...SMMMMOOOOOO AND GRRROOOOOOO!!!!!

Gro : Thank you Thank.... *crowd goes silent* You Than..Y...

Smo : *begins sneezing uncontrollably from all the dust*

*Crowd Stands and Cheers*

Gro : We're here with a few updates a few old faces and a new one or two.

Smo : *coughing and wiping his nose* I.....I....I....*sneezes and dust goes flying everywhere covering the studio in a nice gray cloud*

Gro : *coughing* Bud disappeared into the nether regions of South Carolina muttering something about top secrets *coughs and sneezes* bombs and going on and on and we haven't heard from him since..and well Manny..he's around somewhere.

*Smo dives under the desk and resurfaces wearing a gas mask.

Smo: *breathing like Darth Vader* Gro....*breathes*.....I am not your *breathes* father....

*A tall dark shadow appears in the cloud of dust.

Smo: *breathes* Whoa...

*Gro is now in the floor coughing and weezing from all the dust as the shadow figure approaches the desk and trips over his body. A loud thud echoes through the studio and more dust begins circulating in the air as the shadow figure joins in the coughing and sneezing.

Smo: *breathes* This is too cool...*breathes*...we better get on with the show.

*Smo gets out of his chair and kicks Gro yelling at him to get up.

Gro: *coughing* I ca..*cough*.. I ca...*cough...I can't breathe!!

*Out of nowhere a buzzing, similar to a vaccuum cleaner, fills the studio and the dust begins to clear.

New Face: OOOOOOOOOhhhhhhwwwwiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeee it's dusty in here.

*Gro starts to breath normally again.

Smo and Gro in unison: Deko!!!!

Deko: Ey yo, what's up guys?

Smo: Nothin' man just....uhhhh dusting you could say.

Gro: Haha something like that..*looks into camera*..and for all you people out there wondering who this is, it's the newest Nice Guy.....Deko!!

Smo: We found him on the side of the road..eerrr net sitting and felt bad for him.

Deko: OOoohhhhwwwiiiieeee! Smo you're a funny guy.

Gro: Anyways...now that we've got this show started, Smo hit us up with today's story.

*New flashing Nice Guy Story of the Day banner comes crashing to the floor in front of Smo and Gro's desk.

Gro: Damnit!! Which num nut hooked this sign up??

*Hubb looks around and whistles quietly to himself.

Smo: Uhm...I don't have a story.

*Brakes are heard screeching then a loud crash.

Gro: *slowly looks over at Smo* What do you mean....you don't have a story?!

Smo: That's exactly it. I don't have a story. It's been so bad, I don't even have a story to tell. NGFL lives on through silence and my neverending loneliness.

*Gro calmly gets out of his chair, walks over to the wall, opens a small glass case, and pushes the big red button and returns to his seat.

Gro: I had hoped to have to never use this, but it looks like I've been forced too!

*Smo, Hubb and Deko look on in terror. Deko from lack of knowing. Hubb and Smo from knowledge.

Hubb: You just didn't....

Smo: Yes he did...

Deko: What...What is happeneing??

*Hubb, Smo and Gro put on hard hats to wait while Deko stands dumbfounded as a 6 Foot monster dripping with chocolate enters the room and heads straight for Deko.

Deko: Guys...Guys what is going on here?!?!?!?

Gro: Sorry Deko. You being new and all...and well, we need ratings for the show so take one for the team bro. My suggestion would be to run.

*Hubb, Smo, and Gro all dive under the desk as Deko takes off running.

Deko: Guys!!! This isn't funny!!

*The monster begins chasing after Deko as he flees in terror. Smo, Gro, and Hubb stay under the desk and wait.

Smo: What's gonna be even worse is when Deko finds out how to stop it.

Gro: Yea, talk about a mind job. One minute he thinks he's going to die, then the next he finds out he could have stopped it with a simple little task.

Hubb: Wait?!.....that thing can be stopped? You guys told me (after the installation) that you just had to wait till the batteries ran out.

Smo: Well, that was before we installed a few mods into the motherboard of the beast.

Gro: Yea, it came out with a full upgrade kit six months after we bought it. We decided it'd be best to invest some of our money into that in case this ever happened.

*Deko and the monster continue playing a game of tag while Smo, Gro, and Hubb begin to get into a deep discussion over the subject at hand.

Hubb: So....what's the big secret. All you guys keep saying is "a simple task". Freakin' tell me how to stop it all ready!

*The lights seem to dim around the entire area except Gro, as if he is preparing for the infamous monologue of a Shakespeare play.

Gro: Hubb, Hubb, Hubb...don't you understand. If we give it away now, then it totally ruins our reunion case study. It's bad enough that Smo had to go off and ruin our show without having a story. I mean he could have gone out and sacrificed his dignity and pride to get us a story for tonight. The people would have never known we had to stage an event to get a nice guy story. But instead he was noble and honest. And due to his truth telling, we are gonna suffer when the ratings come in. That's why we unleashed the monster and we must now sacrifice our newest best friend, Deko, so that the ratings will climb. If we were to tell the "secret" now, then all suspense would be lost, the audience would know everything, and the whole show would be ruined.

*Smo and Hubb look at each other puzzled as the light begins to fade and return to normal.

Hubb: Riiiiiiight, now just tell me the secret.

*The action focuses back on Deko and the monster.

Deko: Hey guys!! Guys?! I'm getting tired. Please.....

*Deko falls and trips over an old cardboard box lying in the middle of the studio. The monster walks over him and casts a dark, creepy shadow over Deko's body. The theme from Blues Clues begins playing as the suspense builds and Deko's eyes fill with terror....

*Camera comes back to Smo, Gro, and Hubb still under the desk.

Hubb: *looking at the monitor behind the desk* Hey guys look! *points to the monitor* It's Blues Clues! I love this show!!

Smo: Uhmmm....riiiiiiight. Hubb, that show is for little kids...

Gro: ....and sometimes I wonder how they can stand to watch it.

Hubb: Are you serious?! This show is packed full of adult-directed innuendos. Deep down inside, this show is a full blown hardcore porn movie just waiting to be brought out.

*Smo and Gro look at each other confused...

Gro: Whatever Hubb! I wonder how Deko's doing...

Smo: I don't know. I don't hear the monster running around anymore. Maybe it ate him.

Gro: Yea, maybe it ate him.

Hubb: Hey guys...what if the monster caught up to Deko and ate him?

Gro: I guess that means no more Deko...

Smo: Yea, I guess that means....

*Smo and Gro look at each other in horror...

Smo & Gro: NO MORE DEKO!!!!!

*Deko's scream is heard. Smo, Gro. and Hubb bolt to Deko's aid.

Hubb : Hey look up at that...

*Hubb's legs tangle in amongst the Cables on the floor sending all 3 sprawling.

*Deko's scream is heard once more.

Gro: Deko's is finished...

Smo: Uhm new sidekick??

*The camera pans to Deko only to see the monster poised to devour him.

Deko: I leave my teddy bear collection to my mommy..I leave...oh god here it comes ooooohhhhhhhwwwiiieee , one last one for old times sake.

* Deko closes his eyes as the monster gets closer. Just as he is about to devour Deko, Manny enters the room with 2 women and claps twice as the monster just falls to the ground. Manny silently exits the room.

*Deko looks up as the monster stands over him...frozen.

Deko: Ohhhwiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeee!! I live for another day.

Hubb: Whoa... *stares at the monster*

Smo: Well, there's the secret...

Gro: Clap-on, clap off...

*Hubb, being amused by simple things, claps out of amazement and the monster comes back to life and devours Deko........

*The screen fades to black as the group stands stunned....