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Case Study: Hand the Guy a Bud
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Music and screen fade in. We see Smo and Gro sitting behind a sport's announcer's booth.
Gro: Welcome back to yet another episode of NGFL: Case Studies. I'm Gro...(points to his left)...and this is my color commentator, Smo.
Smo: We've got a quite a match-up for you today, sports fan.
Gro: Today we bring the awful story of yet another brother's pain.
Smo: This one is full contact shame at it's finest.
Gro: Our man, Dub, starts his story with a record of a fair amount of success and a few experiences with NGFL.
Smo: The toss is up, and it's heads for team Dub. Kick or receive?
Gro: The time is near the close of summer. Our boy, Dub, is just weeks away from leaving for college.
Smo: And he chooses to receive. This ballgame is underway.
Gro: Now he really had a thing for this girl...
Smo: He's going with the usual gameplan.
Gro: And though she was a little more popular than him, he still had this vibe that something was clicking between them.
Smo: Oooo, he's starting deep in his own territory. Kickoff was 65 yards for a loss of 3 on the return.
Gro: He did the thing that most guys do. He invested his time in talking on the phone and taking her out to places...
Smo: He's going with the Power I formation, with 3 receivers on the field.
Gro: You know he's into her, and he believes she's into him...
Smo: Oh man, he pulled a big surprise on the defense with that play. He put 3 receivers on the field and ran draw left. I give him credit for that one.
Gro: The time was getting closer for Dub to leave for college so he took this girl out one last time...
Smo: He's going to have to pull a miracle to get this first down. I can't believe he's going for it.
Gro: And after spending all night working up his courage, he asked this girl what she thought of him.
Smo: Oh my!!! He's pulling the hail mary, the long bomb!
Gro: She said....
Creepy music begins to play followed by...da!...da!...da!
Gro: and I quote, "I think of you as a........friend."
Hosts lower their heads in shame as the funeral march is being played in the background.
Smo: Ahhh man, picked off by the secondary!
Gro: Anyone wanna guess what happened next?
Smo: (mimicking soccer announcer) GOAL!!! GOAL!!! GOAL!!.....(mumbling under breath)for the jerks.
Gro: She ran off with the same guy who cheated on her with her best friend.....NGFL....and our boy joined the marines. Semper Fi: Do or Die!
Smo: May the force be with you, young grasshopper.
Gro: So to all the Dub's out there, we salute you. Peace out.
Screen fades to black
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©2000 da_soundman Productions
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