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| Case Study: In a Land Far Far Away... |
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*Screen and music fade in. We see Smo and Gro behind the desk this time.
Gro: Welcome to another installment of NGFL: Case Studies, we have a complete unit behind the desk tonight. Smo: Glad to know I complete something. Gro: Tonight we explore why whiners...wait no unfortuantely it seems that I'm told I have to change subjects so I guess I'll go to the Wheel O'Topics. *Wheel O'Topics Music plays as it is rolled out. Smo: (Whining) I wanna spin, I wanna spin! Gro: Give her a spin Smo and see what we got. *Smo spins the wheel. Music plays. Smo begins getting anxious as the wheel slows down. Gro is on the edge of his seat. The wheel stops on..... Camera cuts to Gro. Gro: Great! (Lowers head in disappointment) Men are from Mars, Women are from Zagodactyland. You saw it folks. I didn't pick it, I just report on it. Smo: This should bring some interesting conversation to today's show. *Lookin sideways to Smo. Gro: We're gonna catch heat for this from the feminine faction. Smo: Nah, they probably don't even know what that is. Gro: Ok for those of you who don't know Zagodactyland is that stupid area where all the inhabitants feel the need for someone to make them feel like dirt. Smo: I thought it was that place where...errr....nevermind. Gro: Men come from Mars and Nice Guys Finish Last! Women must be from Zagodactyland and therefore that is the reason we have for nice guys finishing last. Smo: It's got to be. They must have no morals in Zagodactyland, or maybe that's just the opposite. Maybe they're morals are to be treated like dirt. Hmmm... *Gro looks at Smo. Gro: Uhm that was quick, a little to quick I'm afraid. Smo: What are you talking about? Gro: I ran out of info you got any??? Smo: (Places a laptop on the desk) Let's see what we can find out about Zagodactyland. Gro: Go for it homes..... Smo: (Begins typing) Ahh, I see, very interesting. (Shifts laptop so Gro can take a look) Gro: Oh my!!!! Smo: So according to this, Zagodactyland is a place where treating women like dirt is a fine art. Men are trained in the art. Therefore women become accustomed to that style of life and just can't handle being treated nicely. That's robbery. Blast!! Gro: Let's go and see what we can find out first hand. *Screen goes blurry and fades out. It fades back in and we see Smo and Gro standing in the middle of a pre-historic looking forest. It looks like something seen in dinosaur movies. Noises of civilation can be heard. Smo and Gro start heading over to see what's going on. Smo: This is wacked up man. I feel like I'm in Jurassic Park or something. Gro: Yea I know what you mean man this is creep and I'd make a meal for any of those creatures. *People are seen running around with their clothes turned inside and worn backwards. All the little kids are wobbling around their stomachs. The men are walking around in clown shoes and are wearing boxers on their heads. The women are dressed in ragged quilts that have been sown together. They talk in a strange tongue unknown to Smo and Gro. Smo: Let's go see if we can get some answers. (Walks up to a person) Hello, I am Smo and this is Gro, we're with NGFL. We were wondering if you could answer some questions. Person: Daweldfdasdfa dsaodfasl (Makes a noise) ddfasldlieuer mncmvnz eiurasdmdo (Makes a noise) dkjlfasdf dasfkl weop dasl dfsuaiop awnme acnuio. Gro: Uhm seems we have stumbled upon the RJ family reunion...wait maybe not.....uhm let's explore further. Smo: Sure, why not. *Large object goes wizzing past GRO's HEAD!!! Gro: Man lemme tell ya we gotta be careful or we'll go down quicker than Styx after Mr. Roboto. Smo: Hmmm...interesting analogy. *Smo and Gro approach what appears to be the largest house in the village and proceed to enter. Gro: This looks like a school of some sort? Smo: Ahh, where the art is taught. *As Smo and Gro travel through the school they see chalkboards with images of men and women and unintelligable writing, they see rooms lined with guys and dolls that look like females, and also rooms with males and live females and it seems the males are all hositle in all of these "classes". Gro: Is this what I think it is? Smo: It's the training grounds for what we refer to as "the jerks". Gro: Wow I feel like I'm in the middle of the fourties all over again and look at that these females seem to really be attracted to these jerks? Smo: NGFL is not only a modern truth but a pre-historic one. Ah ha! *Smo and Gro watch one of the classes through a window. A teacher converses with one of the males and then the male proceeds to ignore the female as she appears to be asking him for something. The more he ignores her, the harder she tries. Then another male steps in and listens to the female. The male and female converse for a short time then she leaves him and goes after the male that ignored her. Smo and Gro look at each other and nod. Smo: NGFL, always has been, still is, and always will be. Gro: Rock on my Jewish...I mean blueish friend... Smo: This is insanity. Let's go back to the studio and continue to go through our emotional struggles and loneliness like all nice guys do. Gro: I'm there dude I'm there *The screen fades to black. |