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| Case Study: Wacked Up Talking Dolls |
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*Screen and music fade in. Gro is behind the desk.
Gro: Hello and welcome to another NGFL: Case Study. I'm Gro and this is.... uh well Smo's gone. Hold on a sec. *Gro runs off screen and is gone for a bit. He re-enters with a stuffed doll. Gro : Oh here's Smo uhm anyway we have video tape footage for you today. And here we go. *Video tape footage rolls. We see Gro walking down the street. Gro: Today were dealing with finishing last by association. *Gro approaches a girl on the street. Gro: Hello miss uhm how are you today. Girl: Uhm I'm fine. Gro: Well my name is Gro and I'm from MTSU and I. Girl: MTSU guys are losers get away from me. Gro: There we have our first example. *Spots another girl and approaches her. Gro: Here's another one. Hey how are ya? Girl: Good and you? Gro: Oh I'm ok so where are you from? Girl: Virginia how about you? Gro: Oh Manchester, Tennessee. Girl: Eww, I dated Manchester guys they're all big drunks and cheaters leave me alone. Gro: Ouch issues, issues, issues. *Tape ends and Gro is seen in studio with the stuffed doll. Gro: So Smo, pretty conclusive, huh? Gro talking like Smo: *Starts moving doll around* Most definately it does. Gro: Smo, buddy, guys like us are always gonna finish last. Gro talking like Smo: You're so totally right. Gro: Oh, who am I kidding? I have no clue where Smo is and I'm worried. *Gro gets up and starts pacing like a nervous parent. About five minutes later Smo walks in. Gro: Where have you been young man? Smo: You're not my mom. Gro: No but you had me worried. Smo: Since when have you been worried about me? Gro: (Starts to tear up) All you ever do is... (Catches himself and straightens up) Oh no no I wasn't worried at all. Smo: Anyway, (Picks up the doll) what the heck is with this piece of crap? Gro: Hey! That's my favorite doll, don't call it a piece of crap. Smo: Oh (Very sarcastically) sorry. Why did you have this out during the show? It makes you look like a little pansy. Gro: I was pretending it was you and making it talk in your place. Smo: (Holding up the doll and speaking in a squeaky feminine voice) I thought you loved me Gro? How dare you make me pretend to be Smo. That's such an insult. I'm never sleeping with you again. And as far as our kids, they're coming with me. You're never going to see them again, and you're going to have to send me money every month so I can take care of them. I'm taking the Beamer, the stereo system, all your other dolls, you're scooby doo underwear, you're tricycle, all you're wackomon cards, and last but definitely not least, I'm taking (Drum roll) the upside down, inside out, banana openacanoftunaandpooritontoapieceofbread tree! Muwahahahahaha!!! Gro: That's it (In his best Dr. Evil voice) A-hole you're going down. *Gro releases years of torment upon Smo's head. Smo was dually unprepared for this and it shows. Gro: (As he punches) I'm sick and tired of being the butt of everyone's jokes. I'm tired of getting laughed at, and I'm tired of you getting all the girls I want. *Gro is tossing Smo around like a rag doll. Smo hasn't recovered from the initial attack. Gro: See what you get when fat people get irate. They go WWF style on ya buddy. *Gro suddenly realizes what he has done and stops dead cold with Smo above his head. Smo hit's the ground with a thud. Gro: Smo little buddy are you ok? Smo: (Lying limp on the ground) I can't feel my right arm, my left arm feels like dead weight, my right ankle feels broken, my toenails are ripped off, my fingers are tingling, 80% of my hair has been ripped out, my kids are going to have flat heads, my stomach feels like it's been kicked into my lungs, I can't see anything, there's a ringing in my left ear, my nose is bleeding so much I can't breath through it, and my back feels like I've been shot with a fully automatic rifle, but I think I'm ok. Gro: Well that's good. I'm going to go finish the show now. Smo: I won't be going anywhere anytime soon. Gro: No prob Bob. Anyway, that's all for today's show. I'm Gro, that limp mass on the ground is Smo and if you're under 13 watch out for Stefan Jacobs he might have your phone number. *Screen fades to black. |